Monday, 15 June 2015

Spot the Faux

It was indeed a challenge, but somehow worked out how to incorporate 'gargoyle' into my latest story for Sheryl Gwyther's 52-Week Flash Fiction Challenge on Facebook. Yay!
Spot the Faux (496 words) 
I detested waiting rooms. I perched on the edge of the chair, thumbed impatiently through ancient magazines, tapped the toe of my Jimmy Choos, compulsively checked my phone and sighed incessantly until I finally heard my name. 
That voice sounded vaguely familiar and when I looked up I could barely believe my eyes. Pimply Penny. I hadn't seen her since high school. I couldn't remember her last name, but I did remember the day I'd counted her zits then asked her if she knew what I was counting. She’d said nothing so I guessed she didn't. 
I was twelve and she'd sat in a seat I'd saved for my then best friend Chelsea. Turns out Chelsea was a complete biatch. I haven't seen her since I caught her bonking my bastard first husband in the bathroom at our wedding reception. Maybe I should have asked Pimply Penny to be my bridesmaid! Anyway, I doubted she’d recognise me now. At least her skin had almost cleared up. Good for her. 
Turns out she wasn't bad at cleaning teeth. I guessed it took a certain type of person, but I wondered why that kind of person more often than not looked like they should lay off the tasty pastry. When she was done she pulled the suction from my mouth and looked me in the eyes. 
‘Gargoyle!’ she said. 
Well! I wasn't completely sure what that meant, but I knew I’d never been more insulted in my life! 
I wriggled off the chair, grabbed my Louis Vuitton bag and went to storm out just as the delectable Dr Dan arrived to give me the once over. I retraced my steps and pretended to be taking an urgent message on my iPhone 6 then climbed back up into the chair as seductively as I could. I didn't starve myself for three days and shoehorn my way into those Gucci pants for nothing. 
'Problem?' I heard Dr Dan ask Pimply Penny. 
'No idea,' she said, acting like nothing had happened, 'I just asked her to gargle!' 
My eye began to twitch. Probably time for another round of Botox. 
From the corner of my eye I thought I saw Dr Dan grab Pimply Penny’s butt as she left the room. I snapped my head around only to see her smiling back at me from the doorway, and once Dr Dan’s back was turned she stripped off a latex glove, waggled the rock on her ring finger in my direction and unmistakably mouthed the word 'Gargoyle'.  
It was horrific! I’d have to find out what that word meant, but I could spot a fake diamond a mile away. It gave me palpitations. When I was finally back in the comfort of the heated leather seats of my BMW I called my therapist, took a deep breath and tried to put it all behind me. I had an appointment with the hottest personal trainer in town and I didn't want to disappoint him.

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